During my pregnancy with Abi I somehow managed to only gain a couple of lb. For the first time in my life I was able to eat double what I ever had before and I barely gained any weight which made post partum weight loss the first time around pretty easy. Over the course of 3 years my weight went up and down but as soon as I fell pregnant with Isabel the complete opposite to my pregnancy with Abi happened. I put on a lot of weight- Over 3 stone to be exact. I didn't particularly eat much (well I did towards the end through boredom) but I was on and off bed rest from 5 weeks up until 12 weeks, before eventually being put on rest until the end the pregnancy from 20 weeks. Obviously eating more and more as my appetite grew and doing minimal excersise- from 33 weeks I wasn't even aloud to hoover- didn't bode well for weight gain of any kind. I didn't weigh myself after Isabel was born because I don't have the greatest relationship with the scales but the pressure of a new born, a toddler and general life meant that food was the last thing on my mind. That of course meant I lost some weight and even if I didn't fit into my pre pregnancy jeans, I didn't feel too awful. My jeans were loose, my stomach slimmed down a lot quicker than it did with Abi and it was heading in the right direction. But eventually I settled into family of 4 life which meant I suddenly had time for food and of course weight crept on again. A couple of years I ago I joined slimming world and lost just over a stone in 5 weeks, so I knew that slimming world was the route I wanted to take for my post partum weightloss. Because of the hectic lifestyle that comes with having a young family I was reluctant to join a group though and tried to do it from home, failing every day at precisely 5pm when all I wanted was fast food and chocolate. I'm one of those people who need the emotional torture of a group to keep my on track. Knowing that if I gain instead of losing anything, and that I will have to explain why I think that happened is enough to keep me away from any binges. So at 13 weeks post partum I rejoined my local slimming world group. The feeling of getting back into cooking fresh food, meal planning and being in control was the definite push I needed and I'll be honest it's been amazing. I spent my first week completely in control, never going over my syns and sticking to all my meal plans. I was so ready for my weigh in, then Abi was rushed to hospital and I couldn't make it. Monday I didn't eat anything all day until everything calmed down and at about 5pm I realised I was starving. The only food that the cafe had to offer was a cheese and onion sandwich, cake and crisps. Not that it was a problem- it was the end of the day and I was just greatful for food! Getting back into the swing of things hasn't been easy- after a couple of days of the least slimming world friendly food ever that's required no effort, the idea of cooking isn't great! But after a couple of days of rubbish eating, I also felt really eugh and sluggish so that's enough to kick me back into shape too. I've been experimenting and making new meals, unlike last time where I stuck to the same ones I knew Chris and Abi liked and touch wood, so far Chris has loved every single meal so far. He's not a fan of quark though so meals that involve that are sometimes questioned, but he's coming around to it. Salad is my least favourite food, I can't bare it and if I do eat it I cover it in dressing and completely make it unhealthy. But we made a slimming world, New York style steak salad and for the first time in my life, I ate a salad without even a pinch of dressing and it's definitely my new favourite meal! It was completely syn free and was made up with Romaine lettuce, beetroot, apple, runner beans, spring onions and gherkin. We seasoned sirloin steak with some Aldi Season all (seriously the greatest seasoning I've ever tasted!) and fried in fry light, 2 minutes on each side for a perfect medium steak. There was enough flavour from the steak to mean absolutely so seasoning was neccessary and it was amazing. I was a little upset when I took my last mouth full and I'm seriously considering making this a weekly meal (Chris will super happy about the most expensive salad ever...) My go to breakfast is always porridge with berries and Nutella! I love porridge and Nutella and it's the perfect start to my day. To bulk it up a little I've been adding some grated carrot and cinnamon and it tastes amazing! Getting back into any sort of healthy eating, weightloss, or lifestyle change after a new addition is pretty tough. Sleep deprivation definitely sends me straight to the chocolate! I also really struggle to find time to excersise, not that I need much of an excuse not to excersise, I hate it. Which is why I prefar to go on walks as a family as im having so much fun I don't feel like in excersising or missing out while i do a work out etc.
I don't have any short term goals that I need to reach asap, which works better for me as I don't feel so pressured. I'm frustrated when I have bad days but I know that it's not going to impact anything or how I feel. One bad day isn't the end of the world and I'm only human- a human who really loves Nutella. My main goal that I'm determined to be at my ideal and dream weight for is our wedding which is in May 2019 which is obviously a really long time. But the way I look at it, it gives me plenty of cheat days and plenty of weekends where I can forget our syns and devour an entire bargain bucket and jar of Nutella to myself (not that I would do that...) One day I do hope I can be one of those people who isn't bothered by how they look as much as I am and doesn't feel defined by a number on the scales or the size of her jeans. But at the moment I am and unfortunately it's only me who can help myself when it comes to accepting my child bearing hips and chocolate loving bum! Im going to be sharing my favourite and most successful slimming world recipes so keep your eyes peeled if you're a fellow slimming world fan! Jess X
0 Comments
As I start to write this, I'm sat watching Abi run around a hospital room full of beans, dancing, laughing and being a happy little girl. Rewind less than 24 hours ago and it was a different story.
Being a mum is challenging for a million reasons. But the biggest challenge for me is how much I love our girls. I know how that sounds, but let me explain. When you're a parent you love your child so fiercely the thought of them in pain or unwell hurts you the same, if not more than it does them. Sleepless nights, embarrassing public displays and bad behaviour are things I can deal with, seeing the girls unwell or in pain is something I can't. I hate not being able to help them, make them better and soothe them. This last year has seen us depend on the NHS more than either myself or Chris have in our entire lives. It's coming up to a year to the day that we found out that we were expecting Isabel and the start of a pretty horrific 8 months. 8 months that saw us up at the hospital nearly every week and one of the most scary weeks of our lives when Isabel stopped moving at 38 weeks. And as if the universe knew, yesterday we experienced the scariest few hours of our lives to date (it better not be a pattern!) Long story short Abi had a fast acting infection in the right side of her chest, when I say fast acting, I mean that she went from singing to Moana to not even being able to stand within minutes and her face was grey. You need to of experienced this to know that seeing your child limp, grey and pretty much unresponsive is something that will haunt a parent forever. If you've read my blog for a while you will know that I'm crazy neurotic when it comes to the girls and Chris and their health. Abi had spent Sunday night coughing and being sick a couple of times and ironically it's the first time in our 4 years of parenthood that I didn't run around the house screaming "Chris wake up, we need an ambulance". Yes, I'm that crazy. Like I said above, seeing the girls sick or in pain I instantly go to the ambulance extreme (I'll point out here I have never actually called an ambulance, Chris always talks me down) Anyway, she was a bit sick but fine in herself. She woke up Monday morning happy, albeit still a bit sicky but her normal, won't stop talking self. Then out of nowhere it changed. She couldn't breathe. She went limp. She went grey. Fast forward a few hours we were in Salisbury hospital on the Sarum ward being told that we had a very poorly little girl and it was going to take a while for her to get better. I'm not going to explain everything that happened while we were there and during those hours that were definitely some of the worst of our lives. To be honest it's scared me and I'll probably really struggle with any anxiety I have about it for a while. But because of the amazing nurses, doctors, paramedics and even the receptionists at our surgery, somehow Abi made a pretty miraculous and incredible recovery. Apart from a couple of times during the night that her monitor went crazy because her heart rate went too low or her oxygen crashed ( there was no concern as it was purely because she was in such a deep sleep. Of course I didn't calm down and spent the whole night staring at her) she recovered much quicker than they had even considered. I'll be honest, she really perked up around 5pm and when Chris left af 8pm, it was just Abi and me (and our lovely nurse) for the night. She didn't even entertain the idea of sleep until around 10.30pm which meant for the first time in god knows how long, it was just Abi and me. We cuddled, talked and she had my full, undivided attention for the entire day and evening. The circumstances were the worst but the silver lining was that we were back to how it had been for over 3 and a half years, even if only for a few hours and through her discomfort and fear, she loved it. She also spent the whole evening asking if Daddy could come back and begging to face time to Isabel but that's besides the point. We are home now, but with a pretty hefty list of things to look out for and what feels like a million instructions as to what we need to do to help Abi fully recover. Being 4 years old, Abi has very little understanding of just how sick she was and a few times since we have been home we have had to really double check with her how she is feeling because her breathing has begun to resemble what it did on Monday morning before it went so wrong. But she's reassured us she's fine and continued to try and run around like Usain Bolt and act like a normal crazy 4 year old. Of course she's out of breath and shattered after 2 minutes but she's 4 and despite us constantly telling to calm down and relax, she ignores us and carries on. There was a moment in the doctors surgery just before we rushed off in an ambulance that I think has stuck with me more than anything else. Just after her 3rd go on the nebuliser and the 1st paramedic had arrived, she grabbed my hand, kissed it and said I'll be ok mummy and smiled at me. I wasn't crying, i wasn't showing emotion, well so I thought. But I guess she could see my watery eyes and sense my sheer panic that I was struggle so hard to contain. That little squeeze of my hand was just what I needed to keep me together until Chris arrived and I could let go a little that's for sure. A lot of people are often very quick to criticise the NHS and all the NHS staff who save lives every day. After being a terrified parent I can understand why all to often tempers flare and the nurses and doctors receive the brunt of a scared parents anger (neither myself or Chris did this by the way...) But after seeing just how much pressure is on a single nurse during her shift, my respect for both nurses and doctors sky rocketed. It doesn't take a genius to understand how demanding and important a nurses job is. They literally have lives that depend on them, sometimes several different patients at a time and on a pediactrics ward where they also have scared parents as well as their patients, it's a pretty tense job to say the least. The nurse that helped Abi when we first arrived told us that she had started work at 7am and at 9pm she was still working. Despite her very long and stressful day she still made the time to come and find Abi and give her a book and some bubbles. This small gesture made Abi beyond happy. The nurse we had through out the night was also incredible, she spent an hour talking to me at 2am while she insisted on holding the nebuliser to Abis face while she slept so I could 'relax'. We spoke about how poorly Abi was and she really made me feel at ease because she explained it in what I would I call ''mum terms". She was a mum to a 4 year old little girl and so she knew exactly how I was feeling. She didn't any medical terms and she was honest but in a weirdly reassuringly way. In the last year the NHS have helped us more times than I dare to count. Salisbury hospital in particular. The gratitude I have for each and every member of staff at that hospital, receptionist, midwives, nurses, doctors and the lovely lady's who bring food around- post Labour toast to be more specific... Is more than I have for anyone else. Salisbury hospital will always have the most special place in my heart, not only because it's where our babies were born, but because most importantly it's where our babies were saved. So for once, instead of a negative NHS moan like so many jump straight in to, I'm shouting from the rooftops just how much I love the NHS and why it's so important we do everything can to protect it and all the amazing people who work for NHS. Jess X After days of constant rain and wind, we woke up this morning to some pretty glorious sunshine, of course still a little windy but we decided to take what we were given by the weather gods and head off on a little adventure to Corfe Castle. It's part of the national trust and if you've read any of my previous posts about our days out, you will know how much we love our national trust membership! Despite living here all our lives, like with Kingston Lacy, neither myself or Chris have ever visited Corfe Castle before so it was something new for us all. We parked at the visitor centre car park (free with our membership) Put Isabel in her carrier (she is about as fond of it as I am of child birth) and off the 4 of us went. I'll add here that we found the parking a nightmare and compared to the other national trust locations we have visited, there was very little parking. They do offer a park and ride I believe though so during peak times I imagine that's definitely something we would look into. There are quite a few beautiful walks Surrounding the castle but because it was so windy and we hadn't packed a picnic we just went for a quick walk around the castle. Because we parked at the visitor centre, there is a short walk from the car park to the entrance but it's beautiful and to be honest, it's made us want to head back to try some of the walks that surround the castle. Abi did a classic feral toddler thing and declared she needed a wee just as we were entering (luckily right by the toilets which is a first) but while weeing, she decided to very loudly declare that she needed to poo and proceeded to give myself and 3 older ladies a running commentary of her bowel movement. Then topped off the whole incident by walking out the cubicle, parting her butt cheeks and asking "is it clean?" Thankfully the lovely ladies who were washing their hands seem to find the whole episode quite funny and we managed to avoid an extremely uncomfortable situation... Thought I'd just throw that in so you can all see just how grand my experience of motherhood is! On several tourist websites, it says corfe castle is pram friendly... It is most certainly not. Luckily we had packed our mother care baby carrier and chose to take that instead of the pram. They do offer carriers at the entrance though so if you do have littles ones who can't walk but if you don't have a carrier they have some to offer on site. Even though the weather was bright and sunny, the wind was borderline hurricane at the top of the castle. Isabel was pretty angry and after switching her from front facing back to her facing me she could snuggle in and be protected from the worst of the wind. Thankfully, with some heavy rocking and constant moving she fell back asleep and stayed that way for the rest of our visit so didn't get too wind swept! Abi loved wondering around the ruins and exploring. She's starting to become quite the story teller and enjoyed telling me all about the unicorns and dragons that she thinks used to live at the castle all those years ago. There are some amazing views from the Castle and I really was in awe of how beautiful they were. I had one of those "I really love where we live" moments where you feel humble and at peace! The great thing about Corfe castle is that it's a lot smaller than the national trust locations we've visited previously, so it's perfect for a day where the weather is slightly iffy. We did the entire castle within about 1.5 hours and it was the perfect amount of time for a bit more of a taxing walk with a toddler and a baby. Like I said above, it's not pram friendly at all so a carrier is a must, either your own or hire one from the national trust at the entrance. It's also pretty steep in places, with the original rocky and uneven paths. It also has some sudden drops so sensible shoes are something I would definitely reccomend. We loved corfe castle and so did Abi. It's the first time we've done a national trust without having to entice her into walking with the promise of Pokemon hunting, her own imagination was enough to keep her interested and engaged in what we were doing the entire time. We will definitely be back again in the near future, hopefully on a day that isn't so windy you genuinely lose your footing a little. I say it everytime but I really would reccomend a national trust membership to anyone with a young family, it is such great value for money and there are always things to see and do whatever the weather. I'll leave you with some of the fab pictures that Chris took of our day! Jess
X You wouldn't think it by looking at her, but Abi is a bit of a thrill seeker. She may not be able to jump off a step or bounce on a trampoline but she love's a rollercoaster. So it's no surprise that if we ask her where she would like to go for a day out she always say's 'Somewhere with ride's'
As a family we love visiting Chessington. It has everything you want in a day out, especially a day out with little ones. It has rides- for all ages, animals, a sealife centre and a massive choice of food as well as plenty of seating and picnic spots! During our last visit, I was surprised by how many messages I received from fellow parents of thrill seekers asking about how we plan our day and how we make it work with a toddler and a baby! So I thought I would share our top tips for a Chessington day out. So... 1 We live in Verwood, which is just outside of Bournemouth, so it takes us about 1.5-2 hours to get to Chessington. The park is open 10-5 during off peak dates and 10-6 during the peak summer dates. We aim to leave around 8-8.30am and touchwood, we have always managed to avoid any really heavy traffic. Travelling during rush hour with a toddler and a baby is pretty stressful, specially when the fear of a stereotypical rush hour gridlock is playing in the back of your mind the entire journey. SO, pack snacks for the journey! Plenty of them. We also try to entice Abi into a nap- not that it ever works because she cant possibly sleep through the excitement! 2 Like most theme parks, the parking can stretch pretty far with plenty of different car parks with different sections depending on how busy the park is that day. Each car park has really easy access to the different park entrances and they aren't too much of a walk. That being said, I wouldn't leave picnics or things you may need but don't want to carry around for the day in the car. You can get your hand stamped so you can leave and walk back in but there are several different entrances to the park that go with all the different car parks so you could be facing a pretty hefty walk if you leave via the wrong entrance. Which leads me to REMEMBER WHICH CAR PARK YOU'RE IN! Also which entrance you first entered the park through. There is no worse feeling than realising you've left through the wrong entrance with an over tired toddler in one arm and a hungry baby in the other! There are plenty of lockers throughout the park that you can hire for the day for a small fee and leave any belongings you don't fancy carrying around. 3 I mentioned before about food and they have an amazing selection. We have eaten at chessington once and for theme park food, its all pretty tasty. There are several restaurants and what feels like hundreds of food stands so plenty of food to choose from. Having a toddler who seems to be hungry all the time but too distracted to actually eat we often take a picnic. It means we can stop and have a snack when ever we need and that we also don't waste any money on a meal that Abi probably wont finish. There are so many places to stop, eat and feed a baby so you never feel under any pressure at all either which really helps ease any stress that comes with a day out with a baby. 4 Think about what time people are most likely to have lunch. Not only will this save you from queuing for a stupidly long time for some chips, but at the peak lunch times we found that the queue times drop massively- especially on the rides for smaller children. We either have lunch at around 11am before the rush or have a quick snack on the go and enjoy the shorter queue times before sitting down around 2pm for a later lunch. 5 If you want to attend any shows, find out the times before you even start the day. During peak seasons, the shows fill up pretty fast so it's always best to get there in plenty of time to ensure some decent seats so that your littles can see the show. Also, like the lunch times, if a show is on, we have found the rides surrounding the show tend to be a lot quieter when it's on. So if you're not to bothered by watching it, it's definitely worth heading in that direction so you can enjoy some quick queue times. 6 This will sound silly, but pick up a map. It may sound obvious but if you already have your tickets you don't actually get offered a map so you have to seek out somewhere that has them. On our first visit we never managed to get one and as you can imagine, that was quite the experience. Chessington is HUGE so you really do need one. 7 Because Chessington is so big its best to plan your day and get an idea of what rides you and your little ones can go on and what you want to see the most. There is a massive selection of animals as well as rides and it is a lot to fit into one day. You can actually stay in one the hotels that are part of the chessington resort and have two days to do the whole park. We haven't done this yet but we are currently planning on doing so for our next visit. 8 We look at our day as 3 different parks. You have the rides, the animals and the sealife centre. When we first visited we were so surprised at just how many animals there were. To make the most of our day, we personally do most of the animals first. Not only does this mean that you can the focus on the rides but it means that usually the queue times are quite a bit shorter in the afternoon! A massive bonus to do it that way is that it also gives you something to bribe the tired toddler with- the promise of a ride always gets Abi moving! 9 When it comes to leaving the park, be prepared for a bit of a rough ride unless you decide to leave a little earlier than closing. As you can imagine thousands of people all leaving at once does cause some chaos, especially during peak times like school holidays. During our last visit it was half term and it took us roughly 20 minutes to leave the park and over an hour to leave the car park. So, with that taken into account, we either leave about half hour before closing or we hang around for a while- which is always a good idea when you have little ones. It's the perfect time to give a baby their pre drive home bottle and fill a toddler up with some snacks because after a busy day, no one wants to hear a whinging hungry toddler for the drive home! 10 And finally, pay for your car park ticket at the beginning of the day! It's £3 to pay to park which is seperate to the cost of your park tickets. If you wait until the end of your visit when you're trying to leave you're bound to forget (like we did) so if you get done and out the way at the beginning of your day it's over with and you can forget about it until it's time to leave. So there you have it. Top tips for a chessington day out! Jess X A couple of weeks ago I was invited to attend the screening party of Universals new show, Ransom. I'll admit now that I was pretty apprehensive and nervous to attend. I had absolutely no idea what to expect as this was the first time I had ever been invited to something like it. After several email exchanges with Sarah from way to blue PR though, I felt much more confident and I really couldn't wait. I decided to force Chris to come with me which was really great as it was the first day, just us, since way before Isabel was born. Actually probably since before I fell pregnant! We dropped Isabel with my mum (see previous post about how I felt about that!) and caught the train at midday. We arrived in London just before 3pm which gave us 2 and a half hours before the start of the screening. Me being the shopping loving Mumma that I am, made chris walk around several shops on Oxford street - much to his delight - before we headed to the Soho Hotel where the screening was being held. Before we arrived we did stop off for a quick bite to eat at an amazing chicken restaurant- Billy and The Chicks in Soho. Think KFC but 1000% nicer (and I love KFC so for me to admit that it must of been good!) As well as amazing food, it is great value for money and the actual restaurant itself was super quirky and had an amazing atmosphere. You order your main and sides separate. I went for 2 pieces of fried chicken and Chris went for a Classic chicken Burger and we got 1 side of chips. The chicken pieces were huge and so tasty and Chris's burger was also huge and from the look on his face, pretty tasty too. It was also a good job we only went for 1 side because the portion of fries was huge and there were plenty for us both. One of my favourite things about London are all the quirky little restaurants that are hidden down back streets. I love finding new and different places to eat when we visit. We will definitely be returning to Billy and the Chicks in the future! Once we had eaten we made our way to the Hotel. I got pretty. Nervous and the amount of people stood outside (we think there were quite a few celebs in the actual hotel) waiting around for autographs made me even more anxious. It turned out there were several pretty famous people In the hotel while we were there which explained the large group of people waiting for autographs. We were shown the direction we needed to head in and made our way down stairs to the screening rooms. The Soho hotel is huge and absolutely beautiful. We were shown to a room for canapés and champagne and we got to meet other guests at the screening too. I'm really greatful I took Chris because I am not ashamed to admit that I probably would of scarpered pretty soon. Being in a room full of people who seem to know what they are doing is incredibly daunting. It wasn't long before we were tucking into our 4th round of delightful canapés and 3rd glass of champagne and I finally mustered up the courage to talk to someone who wasn't Chris. I got talking to a lovely lady Called Laura and it was really interesting talking to someone in the industry. She attends screenings all the time so the whole evening was a bit mundane for her, where as for me it was the complete opposite. The dress code was smart casual so I went for black jeans, some dolly shoes and a white shirt. But for everyone who attended these events often, they were pretty casual. I guess once you've attended one you get to know the protocol for events such as these. Laura did a great job of explaining how they work etc which helped calm my nerves a little- although the champagne could of helped that as well... The canapés that were on offer were incredible. Our favourites though we're definitely the mini cones of cod and Chips and the most amazing little brownie bites. They had tempura chicken, bean frittas, smoked salmon and cream cheese and chorizo sausage rolls too amongst some other incredible treats. After an hour, we were taken through to the screening room. Unfortunately I was unable to get any pictures but the entire room, like the hotel, was incredible. The seats were actually sofas and somehow, Chris and me ended up with some great seats right in the middle and in the 2nd row. We were given a goody bag which contained a bottle of prossecco, some universal tv chocolates, some posh popcorn and some lovely hand and body lotion. It all came in a cute universal tote which, if you didn't know, would of been enough for me alone as I love a reusable tote bag! I don't want to say too much about the show because I don't want to spoil it for anyone who is planning on watching it. But what I will say is that I personally really enjoyed it. We only watched the pilot episode but if you liked Lie to me and the mentalist then you are going to be on to a winner with Ransom. The story line of the first episode had me gripped and I was actually a little disappointed that I will have to wait a couple of weeks for the second episode. The Q&A with Luke Roberts was really interesting. Listening to a lead actor discuss the different aspects of both becoming the character and filming the series made me see the entire show from a different light. Luke actually only had 4 weeks from accepting the role to the start of filming, which blew my mind a little as I imagine jumping from one role to another so quick must be quite difficult. A massive bonus is that Luke Roberts is pretty attractive, which lets be honest, for us ladies (or men, he is that good looking) is always an added extra to a tv show if we have someone pretty to admire! Before we went to the screening I did a little research before and unfortunately the series has actually been cancelled in America, so we arrived not having high hopes for it. But after watching it and liking it so much, I had a little stalk of the actors social media accounts and there is some chatter about them being in negotians with another Channel for series 2. While doing all my stalking It became quite apparent that it has quite a following in America, which surprised me a little because it's been cancelled, but we will have to hope and see if the negotians bring another series. I personally can't wait to see the rest of series 1 and to see how it progresses. The screening and Q&A finished at about 7.45, which I'll be honest I was a little relived at. I was shattered and was definitely missing our littles! Leaving the hotel we caught a climpse of a few celebrities which was pretty cool. But our favourite was Kunal Nayyer who plays Raj in Big Bang Theory, or as we now know him in our Trolls loving house hold, Guy Diamond! Chris couldn't resist a quick picture and he was super happy. Kunal was really friendly and happily obliged to Chris's Fan boy ways. Being the party animals that we are, we were home by 10.30pm and tucked up in bed by 11pm.
It was such an amazing experience and it was so nice to have a day with just Chris. When you have children you definitely forget what it's like to have time to together where you can be something else other than mummy and daddy. That being said we spent the entire day saying "We should bring Abi to London" or "Abi would love that" or "I miss the girls". But after finally having just us time for the first time in months, I will be shouting from the rooftops that all us parents need to enjoy couple time without the littles when we can! If you're into tv shows that make you think a little and have some action I would definitely reccomend giving Ransom a watch. I would also really recommend trying out Billy and the Chicks for a tasty free range fried chicken dinner! The whole day was amazing and I can't wait for another experience like it again- hopefully! Jess X As I write this, I'm sat on a train with Chris on our way to London. We are attending my first event that I've been invited to through writing this blog
That means no children for us for an entire afternoon and evening. While I've been super excited for this, I've also been rather apprehensive. I've left Abi whilst we've had date night and other social events many times before, but other than 4 hours when she was 4 weeks old, I've not yet left Isabel for this length of time, or been so far away from her. Separation anxiety is at an all time high right now. It's been just over an hour and I've text my mum twice already... Judge all you want but it's true. When Abi was a week old I was readmitted to hospital for a few hours and we were unable to take Abi with us so my mum had her. It was the hardest night of my life but it did do me some good because I started to feel comfortable with being away from her. Chris and me enjoyed a few quick (I mean really bloody quick) date nights before Abi was 12 weeks old and it really did us good. But this time with Isabel it has been completely different. I have definitely struggled to leave Isabel. Even if I leave her with Chris for just 10 minutes while I pop to the shops, I find myself feeling a mix of anxiety and guilt. It's definitely subsided in recent weeks, hence leaving her with my lovely mum today so we can attend this event but it's not been easy. There are two things that have made it a little easier to do though and that's knowing I'll have a whole afternoon and evening with just Chris complete with no interruptions from a small child! And the opputunity to wear something that won't be covered in baby sick within an hour. I've also bothered to do my hair and apply actual make up- not a mum bun or greasy face in sight! I'm also planning on having an alcoholic beverage for the first time in over year too which really does soften the heartache of not having my littlest love attached to my hip! I'll no doubt be texting my mum repeatedly though throughout the entire day, like I said it's been twice so far in less than hour so who knows how many more as the afternoon continues! I really didn't expect to be as emotional as I have been when it comes to leaving Isabel but I am enjoying just how relaxed I am (when I say relaxed I mean I'm sat in peace and quiet and not being pestered by any little people... Just chris) When you spend all your time being a mum (which I LOVE) it is incredibly easy to forget how to be yourself and enjoy time without the children. It's also amazing how easily you forget what it's like to be sat in silence and pee in peace! How did you cope when leaving your new baby for the first time? Did you struggle with your subsequent babies more than your first? Let me know! Jess X On May 31st my little love will be 4.
I can't believe I've even just typed that. How is she 4 already? Abi has taught me a lot since I first got that positive pregnancy test. The first thing being that you really can love something so much it hurts. She's also taught me that you can ruin someone's entire day by giving them the wrong spoon... As I write this, she's sprawled out on the sofa watching Pokemon with the rain bashing against our windows. A stark contrast to this time 4 years ago where I was probably waddling around counting down the days till her arrival and devouring an entire box of cereal with 6 pints of milk in the garden. The last 4 years have been so many different things - exciting, fun, scary and testing. I would honestly say some of my hardest days have been in the last 4 years- those first time mum new born days to name a few. The love I've felt for Abi since the day she was placed in my arms is beyond anything I have ever felt before. And each day it's grown and grown into a love that's all consuming. I would literally do anything for my darling daughter. She's grown into the kindest soul, full of love (and naughtiness) and is forever willing to make new friends and experience new things. The last year she's come into her own, she's become my bestest friend, more than she ever was before. Some days she was the only person I saw when I was so poorly with Isabel and she never once misbehaved. She was my Little Rock, my little play mate. The person who kept me sane. I remever when I was first pregnant and I was being sick, she walked into the bathroom held my hair and rubbed my back. She held me together when some days I was pretty close to curling up in a ball and going into some sort of hibernation! Since Isabel has arrived she's been the greatest big sister anyone could ever ask for. It makes my heart hurt watching her dote on her baby sister and show her off. She can't get enough of her and I truly believe she will forever be like this and really be the greatest sister. Despite my nurotic tendencies, Abi is adventurous and fearless when it comes to animals. She is true little wildling and I fully expect she will be busting our chops for a dog (she already does!) and a horse by the time she's 10. Her love for her ballet is sensational and for a child who has no attention span, we ask ourselves every week how she manages to focus for a solid hour at her lessons. It's because she loves it so much and seeing her smile away in her tutu is beautiful. She is a kind and loving soul who could make friends with a corpse. She loves everyone and everything and I hope she always stays that way, while protecting her heart and feelings of course. Her naughty days are few and far between and despite me feeling like sometimes she's out to ruin me and upset me, I know she's not. Her naughty ways are just typical toddler behaviour and we really are lucky to have such a well behaved loving little girl. I know that in 10 or 15 years she will read this and probably die of embarrassment and I'll Prepare myself for that! But for now, while it's not embarrassing for her, I will scream and shout from the rooftops how proud I am of my baby girl, the little human who taught me the true meaning of love. Who taught me that no matter how hard life gets, there's always a little person who is your biggest fan! Happy 4th birthday Abigail Marlie. I'll love you forever and a day, to the moon and back and more than anything in the world. When Isabel was born, the lovely people who Chris gets to call his collegues all rallied together and brought us a Babies'r'us Voucher for £100... I was ecstatic. You wouldn't think it with my pretty lose purse strings, but I'm quite tight when it comes to spending money on things that our children will outgrow within a matter of weeks. BUT this gift meant I could go a bit wild in my fave place... Abi had a pretty boring play mat, Pink, flower shaped and had a few dangly things that I'll be honest, bored me just looking at it. But we were given it by a family friend so was free and Abi enjoyed it for at least 10 minutes a day until she was about 6 months old. When Isabel arrived I got it out the loft and surprise, the high maintenance baby that we had lovingly brought into the world hated it. At only 2 weeks old I think she was actually disgusted that we, her parents, had tried to get her to entertain herself on something so boring. Fast forward a week and we received the voucher, Chris being Chris suggested we wait until we needed something, like weaning things and other practical baby related items. Me being me ignored his idea and headed straight to Babies'r'us and their ginormous play mat section. I wont lie, I spent over an hour picking up every mat they had and reading the description and actually googling some review while there. I'm fairly certain the staff were a bit suspicious of me at one point... I had quite a lot of criteria that I needed this play mat to match, not too big, not to boisterous, some sounds, and finally not so expensive we need to re-mortgage the house... There was one that ticked all these boxes and one extra... The Bright starts Light up Lagoon! First things first, the price. We paid £35 and if I'm honest I really do think that's a perfect price for this play mat, and you get a much better product than you expect. It is also the perfect size. There is plenty of room for Isabel to attempt to roll over and also for Abi and me to lay under it with her when we all want to play. At this point I hear people asking why I would want to lay under the mat as well and that's easy, Its relaxing. Not only does it have two different sound options- nursery rhymes and rainforest/water sounds. There is also some pretty great lights in the canopy of the mat. The lights combined with the sounds (more so the rainforest/water) is incredibly soothing for me as an adult so it must be even nicer for a baby. Isabel often falls asleep while on there! Both music features are great and not annoying either, they are subtle and like I said, relaxing. There are also 2 volume levels which means it doesn't have to be overbearingly loud!
Another great feature is that after 25 minutes the music and lights turn themselves off which is perfect for if Isabel falls asleep! It does however mean that if she hasn't fallen asleep and is still happy playing on it, we have to stop what we are doing and turn it back on immediately! It comes with 3 toys that hang off of the canopy and a mirror as well as an extra hoop for the 4th space on the canopy that we have actually hung the mirror off of a few times. As well as the toys it comes with a cushion that is designed to help with the all important tummy time. Its a great addition and has certainly helped to improve Isabel's enjoyment of something that Up until we got the mat, she wasn't a fan of! Like everything that babies come into contact with, it gets pretty dirty with sick and dribble. Thankfully it washes up perfectly and remains in great condition and doesn't fade at all. The Light up Lagoon is definitely my favourite baby purchase to date. It is great value for money and it has given Isabel hours of fun and entertainment since we brought it. We obviously got ours from Babies'r'us but it is available online and at several different retail stores! I was so disappointed to find out that there was actually a Bright starts lullaby lagoon rocker which is basically a bouncer with the amazing light up canopy, but unfortunately after hours of searching I don't think its available anymore! For any one expecting, or for anyone who is looking for a new play mat I would 100% recommend the light up lagoon. Its perfect in every way and I truly cannot fault it. Jess X When you become a parent for first time, it is pretty easy to take everything you read, or hear, as gospel. From breast is best to Co-sleeping, there are so many different opinions on appropriate care and parenting styles its easy to become confused and make a wrong decision for you as an individual.
One of the biggest things that concerned me and caused me more stress and worry than anything else when I first had Abi was the dreaded 8 week jabs. In brief, from 8 weeks your baby can have 3 jabs and an oral solution that ultimately protects them from tetanus, Meningitis B, sickness and diarrhoea (also known as rotavirus) diphtheria, whooping cough, polio and pneumococcal disease. There are also 2 more lots of jabs at 12 weeks and 16 weeks. If you for any reason are a bit behind on your jabs, for example Isabel has only just had her 8 week jabs at 12 weeks as she was sick then its actually no issue at all. There just has to be 4 weeks between visit. Anyway... I was terrified of Abi having the jabs for no other reason than I knew she would cry. But when I was researching and looking for hints and tips on how to lessen the horrible effects of the jabs I was astounded to find that a lot, and I mean ALOT of parent's are completely against these immunisations. I found myself reading pages and pages of parent's who had awful experiences with their first childs jabs so refused to allow subsequent children to have them (which you are completely within your rights too!) From such high temperatures that their children were hospitalised to some people blaming the immunisations for their children's disabilities. The list was endless to peoples reasoning. As a first time mum reading this a couple of days before I was due to take my first born, it was safe to say I was terrified. I found myself in a complete state of panic at all the possible horrific outcomes, all the while knowing in the back of my mind that everyone in our families had had them and they were all fine. Eventually I realised I was being foolish and went to our appointment where I had to endure Abi wailing in agony at just 8 weeks old because of the horrid needle. BUT she got over it and so did I (eventually) and she fell asleep for hours and woke up like nothing had happened. Barely a sniffle of a temperature and that was the last we heard of it. She did the exact same at her 12 and 16 week jabs too. For some reason, I have been a lot more worried about Isabel having them than I was with Abi. I think its probably because of the pregnancy and her first few months being testing that I feel slightly more protective. But when she was 9 weeks old, we headed off to the surgery only to be sent away because little Miss B had a temperature. We were rebooked in for 2 weeks time and that was that. The nurse who does all the immunisations at our surgery is really lovely and it made me feel a lot more comfortable and relaxed. Before she sent us back home she gave me all the paperwork I needed so I could read before our next visit and be prepared. It is only in the last year or so they have added the MenB immunisation, and that along with the tetanus causes the baby to have quite torrid time for roughly 24- 48 hours I was told. So for 2 weeks I certainly worked myself up. Our next appointment rolled around and when we got there Isabel was a dream, smiling, cooing and being the biggest cutie pie, which made me feel worse because I knew that those smiles would vanish in a minute. There were two nurses doing the jabs unlike with Abi where there was just one. This meant that they could do both legs at the same time and therefore 1, didn't give Isabel chance to thrash away and know what was happening and 2, it was over and done with a hell of a lot quicker. By far the worst part of the jabs is your baby screaming the surgery down, hearing their heart breaking screams and not being able to help them understand and that is quite frankly, shit. But they do get over it pretty quick because that's the great thing about babies, they are pretty resilient to pain at this age. Abi and Isabel have been so different so far so I was not at all surprised that Isabel reacted completely differently to Abi. For one, where Abi slept all day and all night and only woke for feeds, Isabel didn't even entertain the idea of a nap... That being said she was In a great mood. Barely any tears and full of smiles, and other than be a lot more clingy that usual (by this I mean screaming if I left her sight and needing me to be touching her at every second) she was herself. The nurse however really wasn't lying when she said that the Men B could cause a horrible temperature. At one point she reached 39.5 degrees out of nowhere but after some stripping down (urine all over the carpet and sofa) and some calpol it came right back down again. The great British weather also decided to finally act like summer to and as well the jabs giving her a temperature, we also had highs of 26 which of course made her worse. She woke up the next day with a bit of a rash on her face which is a combination of the immunisations and the heat but it really hasn't bothered her at all. Although our post immunisation experiences have been pretty easy compared to many others, I thought I would share a couple of things that I did that I think definitely helped us. Specially with the MenB temp! 1- Calpol First of all, before you even get the jabs, a dose of calpol just before your appointment. The nurse actually suggested it and it really helped. Her temperature didn't shoot up like it tends to and I think it helped her a little with any pain! Just before we left I gave Isabel a dose of 2.5ml (she spat a lot out but the tiniest amount will help) and that was that. Her next dose coincided perfectly with her next feed too so that made it a lot easier to give her some when her temperature was high and she really needed it. 2- Minimal clothes To help with any temperature spikes (especially in the summer) strip your baby down. Both the girls jabs have been in the Summer months and both times, as soon as we got home I put them in just a vest. Their temperatures can shoot up really quickly so unless its freezing cold, just a vest should stop it from spiking too high too quickly and reduce any risks associated with high temperatures. 3-BATHS! If your little one loves bath time like Abi and Isabel then a nice splash should really help them feel happy and if they are feeling particularly rough it should distract them for at least 5 minutes! With both Abi's jab's and Isabel's a bath has really helped to cool them down and also settle them. If they have been a bit hot and sweaty it also should make them feel more comfortable. 4-Loose clothing If you cant spend all day at home or somewhere where you little one can remain in a vest all day then I cant recommend loose clothes enough. Especially around the thighs as that's where the injection site is. It causes quite a horrid bruise like in adults so its best to keep anything from rubbing on it. Loose clothing also helps with reducing any temperatures and keeps baby comfortable in general when they are feeling grumpy. 5- Naked bum time The rotavirus immunisation does cause some pretty horrible nappies, so as you can imagine their little bums get pretty sore pretty quick. I made sure that after every nappy change, be it just wee or poo, Isabel could be completely naked and have some air on her pretty uncomfortable toosh. I also applied some kokoso coconut oil and each time it protected her bum from getting too sore and dry. My last tip? Write off your entire day in advance. Every baby is different so you never know how they will react. They may sleep the entire day, they may scream the entire day. You never actually know so be prepared either way. Abi slept and was pretty easy. But Isabel, despite not screaming much, was so clingy I had to wee holding her... Not even joking. Your babies immunisations are the perfect excuse to spend the day cuddling and being lazy after all! Hopefully these are of some use to anyone reading... They certainly helped us! Jess X Before I had Abi, I never understood the whole children starting school scenario, as in I genuinely thought they just "get In" and there isn't any difficulty to it. And even after Abi was born, I didn't quite get it. I didn't understand why parents got so hung up on what school their children got into- I know that sounds completely stupid but bare with me.
I would often hear stories on the news of parents lying about their addresses and religious beliefs just to get their little ones into a specific school and that baffled me beyond belief. I'm a pretty nurotic parent- and everyone who knows me knows this! So when it came to choosing Abigail's nursery I did a lot of research and although we only visited one nursery before signing up her, that was purely because I knew that was where I needed our daughter to start her "school" Years. Fast forward 2 years and she's had the best start we could of asked for. Choosing her nursery was my first sort of understanding as to why parents get so obsessive about first schools. September 2016 I received the Email telling me it's time to apply- I'll be honest, and feel free to judge but I ignored the email and completely refused to believe it was time for my first baby, my little love who was just a bundle of fresh pink skin not 5 minutes ago to start school! I partly blame the fact I was pregnant and having a horrific time for this stupid behaviour but I also hold my hand up and admit it was denial. We attended a meeting at Abis nursery that helped explain the starting school process and I felt a lot better and really started to do my research. I had a pretty good idea of the school I would love her to attend but at this point I still wasn't obsessive. Unfortunately the open mornings coincided with days we couldn't attend but because of the power of the internet, from access to ofsted reports to honest mum reviews I had a pretty good idea. December rolled around pretty quick and I finally plucked up the courage to apply for three schools. Our first choice was the school that I could really see Abi going to and I loved, but I knew it was extremely popular so wasn't counting my chickens and fully expected to have it declined. During all my research I found that each school has its flaws. Not one school was completely perfect. There will always be families that aren't to your personal taste and there will always be aspects to a schools approach to learning etc that you don't agree with. Which is why I personally never have and never would have an opinion on a school nor would I criticise someone for attending a specific school. When we found out we had gotten into our first choice I was shocked and I'll be honest, cried a little with happiness. It was then that I realised that actually, I do kind of get why some parents get so hung up on school admissions. On the day people found out, my Facebook, Instagram and twitter were awash with people who were thrilled at there school places and people who were upset and angry. And I can understand why- specially for those parents who got into a school 15 miles away that they didn't even apply for!!! (I still don't understand how they choose who goes where to be honest) Before we found out that we had gotten our place, we had began our search for a new home. Because of Chris's work, house prices and just general curiosity we had been looking towards Somerset. Only an hour down the road and therefore meaning we could still see our families and friends whenever we wanted. At this point I wasn't bothered about wether we have to change Abis school etc. Like I said above, I was still very much in the mind set that a school is a school and I couldn't fathom why parents get so hung up about it and as a 4 year old, Abi can adapt really well and would thrive even she had to make a big change... Then we got our school place at our first choice and suddenly my excitement at moving to a new place changed. I suddenly didn't want to move out of our beloved Verwood. The place we had started our family. I wanted our children to go to Verwood schools and grow up in Verwood. And most of all I couldn't possibly justify moving Abi and uprooting her at such a new and exciting time in her life. A few weeks down the line and we've decided that we want to stay where we are, in Verwood, in a bigger house admittedly, but in Verwood all the same. And why? Because of a bloody school!! That's right, in a matter of minutes I became a parent who is willing to drop all plans we've worked on for months for a school. We attended an introductory meeting at the school last night and I was secretly hoping I'd walk away feeling a bit less In love with the school and feeling like actually, I did want to move out of Verwood. But no. I walked away even more in love and even more adamant we must stay here and Abi has to go to this school. The teachers, the schools values, and the location of school fill my heart with so much excitement for Abi and what the future holds for her and her first years at a proper school. I walked away knowing that she would have the best possible start to her education and she would be able to thrive and be happy and continue to love attending school like she loves nursery. Chris also fell in love and he's actually harder to please when it comes to anything that concerns our littles more than I am. Since getting offered our place I am surprised at the competitive nature of some parents and I've been faced with some pretty "off" reactions when Ive said we are going because unfortunately their little ones didn't get in and they don't understand why we did. And I'll be honest, I'm sure I would of been the same had the circumstances been different. But I would of always been happy for the child and their family. Not angry, but I guess this is my first taste of the famous school ground competitiveness that comes from parents. Now that we are only a couple of months away from Abi starting school, I am really starting to feel a mixture of excitement and some worry as to how she will adapt and wether she will enjoy it- which I know she will because she keeps telling me she can't wait to go and asks everyday if we are going to big school yet. Abi loves new people, making friends and learning and I really can't wait to watch her develop and experience all the new things that come with school. My one bit of advice to any parents who will be starting their school journey for their little ones this year would be relax. Which is silly I know, but true. No matter how much research you do, open days you attend or wether you apply on sepetmeber 1st when the admissions first open, it won't make a big difference come April when your place is offered. Your child will thrive wherever they go. They will make friends, learn new skills and have fun, because when you're 4 years old it's easy! Now to start filling out our registration forms, ordering uniform and accepting that my little babe will be a school goer in 3 months!! Jess X |