On Friday we went to one of our favourite theme parks- Legoland Windsor. We've been a few times before and Abi has the best time every visit, so on Friday we went as a little surprise as she's been such a great big sister since Isabel arrived. We tried to convince Abi that we were just going on a little picnic but it turns out we didn't fool her at all! When we arrived she quickly informed us that she "just knew" that we were really going to legoland- clearly you can't outsmart a 4 year old. Abi is a massive lego fan- just like Chris! They are obsessed. So as well as the rides, the amazing lego statues are a massive hit for the Bolton's, especially the super hero themed ones... The first ride we always head to is the space tower, imagine MGM's tower of terror but less scary and you do it yourself... Everytime we go she is insistent that she wants to do it only to then cry the entire time in sheer terror. There's a video over on my Instagram (@mummaofdaughters) that will give a good idea of what chris has to deal with every time! There are lots of stalls around the park where you can win prizes- like the traditional fun fair stalls. They cost a lot of money, I can't really get my head around spending £5 to maybe win a teddy that would no doubt be cheaper in wilkonsons. But for someone who is usually so tight, chris loves them and loves winning Abi a teddy! What the pictures don't show is the £10 it cost to win that teddy!! I was really apprehensive on the way as it was our first big day out with Isabel. Having a new born and a toddler leaves me feeling like we are taking our entire house with us on days out and I'm always worried I'll forget something or that Isabel won't be happy with being in her pram so long. But I really needn't of worried as she was absolutely perfect the whole day. One of our favourite parts of the park is definitely the lego city section which includes the famous legoland driving school! As well as the fire training academy (I would highly reccomend having two adults on this ride as the pumping action isextremely hardwork if you're doing it solo with a little one just staring at you offering you no help!) And also the boat academy. Abi loves the boat school and insists on steering it herself... I stupidly tried to take a selfie which meant she lost all focus and just as a I took the picture she crashed into the wall! Theres a great show at various times throughout the day which is very Disneyssque with its music and extreme storyline. It's definitely worth a watch when you're visiting! Like most theme parks, it's pretty expensive but I would personally say its worth the money. We actually use our Tesco club card vouchers. It's only £13.50 worth of vouchers per a person and children under 3 are free. Using your club card vouchers is a great way to have a free day out! Legoland is one of our favourite treat adventures and you canguarantee that every holiday time we have we will visit! It's got such a great variety of rides and activities for all ages as well as amazing lego statues. The lego village that's full of all the worlds famous landmarks built out of lego is incredible! There's a great shop where you can build your own lego mini figures. Chris and Abi were in their element, Chris even made the perfect ninja mini figure but unfortunately Abi didn't like it! For £5.99 you can make 3 mini figures which is quite expensive for what it is but it's exciting none the less. We had a fab day as usual and I would always reccomend a visit if you haven't already been! I'll leave you with a few snaps of our day out... Jess
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When I had Abi, post natal depression or anxiety was a taboo subject, at least it felt like it was. I was really unfortunate with my post natal care after Abi was born, I had a pretty poor 6 week check and so did Abi. And any attempts to ask for advice on anything were futile. But I managed, I used my friends and my family and as a first time mum I feel like I did a pretty good job.
Fast forward nearly 4 years and with Isabel everything is very different. Nothing is taboo anymore, which in a way is fortunate because I've struggled more second time around then I ever did with Abi... After a pretty horrible pregnancy full of constant worry and the genuine thought that we'd lost our little babe, I wasnt surprised that as soon as she arrived I felt like I was constantly panicking. I have always been a worrier, I worry about everything. It's a joke amongst everyone that knows us. But this time It felt very different. I ignored it at first until eventually I admitted to Chris how I was feeling. Telling him helped for about two days, but soon the panic came flooding back and I soon felt like I was constantly on the brink of a full scale panic attack- for absolutely no reason other than my over active worrying. Eventually I told my mum, but I massively down played it. So if you're reading this Ma, I apologise for holding back! But since having daughters of my own, I can now understand why my mum is like she is with me and I do tend to hold back on voicing any concerns or worries I have as I hate knowing she's worrying about me. Unlike with Abi, I had a very in depth 6 week check, where without any prompt from me, the doctor actually spent 15 minutes checking on my well being. I was honest and told her how I was feeling. To my relief, and this isn't meant in a horrible way, she reassured me that she didn't believe I was suffering with post natal depression. But she did however believe I was suffering with mild post natal anxiety. I had never really heard of post natal anxiety but once I thought about it and spoke to her about it, i did come to realise that I had clearly been suffering with it since Abi was born, but Isabel's arrival had caused it to become a little worse. I very quickly decided that I didn't want any medication or councilling, nor did I want to refer myself for some more help. But instead, and the doctor agreed I was going to try and control it my self. As well as my anxiety, I've also found I'm suffering terribly with my body image. I've never been a confident girl, especially when it comes to my looks. But since Isabel I've gained weight, not lost and along with my terrible post baby hair regrowth from Abi, I'm really struggling to like what I see in the mirror. I'm a comfort eater too so when I'm feeling down about the fact none of my clothes fit, I turn to the biscuits. It's a vicious circle! I do have days where I wake up determined to eat healthy but by lunch time I need that extra sugar in my tea and I need Nutella like I need air (#mumlife). I also spoke to my doctor about this and again, she was fantastic. The doctor suggested several ways that I could help my anxiety and how I was feeling in general, all of which based around the premise that I have to remember I'm not just Jess the mum or Jess the fiancée or Jess the house wife and I need to make time- even just 2 minutes a day- to remember that. I'll be honest, I've struggled to get my head round that as some days when chris is at work all day I barely have time to pee so I think you can catch my drift on the struggle to understand how I can make it work! Now, It's been 2 weeks since my 6 week checkand I've done terribly at becoming a better me. I am however solely blaming our busy schedules! So today Im beginning to build a plan to help me become me again and to hopefully be able to control both the anxiety and body image issues before both control me. I'm returning to my healthy eating ways, because I will admit, I always feel better both emotionally and physically when I eat right and I'm finally getting back into running. I'm also going to make sure I have 1 bath night a week which includes a face mask and rubbish magazine. But we will definitely have to see how that goes! As mums, the pressure to appear perfect and 'together' is incredible. Especially since the rise of social media. Instagram, Facebook, twitter and blogs and vlogs are great, but they also make life for us mums a lot more difficult. We are all guilty for forgetting that behind that perfect picture of a mum with two impeccably dressed children and an immaculate home is probably actually a mum Who is desperate for bedtime and is also hiding the fact that the house isn't tidy st all, it's just hidden behind the camera. The appearance of a very Up together mum who seems to be able to do everything 1 handed causes everyone to atleast once feel inadequate. But really, if we think about it, no one is perfect. And chances are everyone is having the same feelings. Getting rid of the stigma that surrounds maternal mental health is vital in the future of helping young mums. Being a new mum, be it your 1st baby or 11th is the hardest thing and the only way I've ever gotten through anything is with the support of family, friends and a great team of health visiotirs. If you feel like you're struggling, never hold it in. It will only manifest into something bigger and create a bigger problem. For maternal mental health month, take a step back an remember you're not alone. The feeling that you're failing is completely unnecessary and I believe we all feel it at some point in our motherhood adventure. Or if you're me, you feel it at least once a day when you never complete your to do list! As I read this back, I know it's a bit of a ramble, but it's felt good to be honest about my personal struggles and admit that behind those pictures of two happy children is a mum who's having to nose dive a tub of Ben and jerries! Jess X I have always loved shopping, and since having children I can safely say I now love it even more. I adore buying clothes for the girls and I'll be honest I say that I find it very addictive. I can never just buy one thing! With Isabel's sudden growth spurt, she's quickly run out of most clothes other than baby gro's! So today I used this as an opputunity to have a little baby clothes splurge. I also got Abi some new bits too but they are for her birthday so I'll do a little post nearer the time. I have always loved Next clothes, for both the girls and my self, but the price has always put me off slightly. But today, I couldn't resist. Unfortunately our local next is going through a refurb so it has a smaller range at the moment but that didn't stop me getting some lovely new clothes for Little B. Because the lovely British weather has yet to warm up, I chose to avoid getting any of the beautiful rompers and summer dresses until it gets a bit more summery. (As I write this the Sky has turned black and is starting to rain!) Im going to start with my favourite purchase! I instantly fell in love with these leggings and t-shirts and the bright and elaborate patterns- I also loved the little rainbow on the bum. The outfits will certainly bring some bright summer feelings into a no doubt wet summer day! The best thing about next baby clothes is definitely the multipacks and the fact you can get the matching tops/trousers, and you can mix and match them to make different outfits. I absolutely adore the giraffe pattern on these. They are still summery but a little more low key than the fluorescent colours in our first outfit! While I was walking around next, a middle aged couple kept calling Isabel a He, and despite me correcting them several times, they still asked 'his' name. So, being the over thinking mum I am, I of course had to purchase some headbands before leaving so that any similar occurrences are at a minimum! I have always said I would never put headbands on either of the girls. I don't know why but I've always had a real issue with them. I think babies who wear them look amazing, but sometimes the head band is a little to big and it completely changes my outlook on them. Well. After putting one on Isabel when we got home, I'm a little angry I never got them for Abi... Im officially a headband loving Mumma!
You know you're a mum when you enjoy spending a tonne of money on clothes that aren't for you! I think I prefar shopping for the girls more than I do myself actually. Once we find our new home I'll definitely be investing in some nice big wardrobes for them to put all their fancy clothes in! Jess X |